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Why pain doesn’t stop?

Why pain doesn't stop? Day after day, month after month... it is evolving, changing, but still hurts and I cannot stop it. I can't find a way how to stop it. It is exhausting... Pain is like a little animal that likes to scratch me from inside, cutting deeper and deeper with its claws. This animal can wake up from any little memory, from any word... Will this pain remain with me forever, until I finally will die? That is a good question. ... Sometimes it doesn't matter how hard I try to forget about the pain and to be a person that I want to be. It hits me back and take away all my strength, so I am getting back to zero...
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Erase or not to erase?

Is it just me? Do I really think very differently from other people? Everyone keeps telling me that when you break up, you BREAK UP, all communication and everything else, if your heart is still bleeding. People say that this is torture… But after all these years, when you consider person as part of your family, how can you turn your back and leave? How can you erase, what was there for a reason? Why build such a strong connection, just to rip it off (which is very painful too; it is a question what is more painful…)? It doesn’t seem right to me. This person is your family, he/she is your friend, and no matter how painful it is, you don’t just… pretend that nothing ever happened. If you…
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Is lie a lie?

Lie… what is it? It is when you intentionally say something that it not true. But why people think that it is still a lie, when this “truth” changes overtime? Today person might tell that he/she loves you, and be honest, because at this particular moment they feel this emotion, but emotions are not constant. Maybe tomorrow this feeling will change. It doesn’t mean that you were lied to. It is not only about love, of course, it is about any emotions, and that’s why promises are silly in a way. Time change everything and everyone drastically. Of course, it hurts, if something you believed to is no longer apply, but you can’t be mad, because time flies by and there is nothing eternal in this world. One more thing…
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First blog post. Let’s begin

First blog post. Let’s begin

   Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about life, trying to analyze feelings, causes and life-views. All my life I tried to be nice to people, I couldn’t really hurt anyone or to be mean. And yet, there are people who blames me for being hurt. But how is that fair? Sometimes their happiness is controversial to mine. It doesn’t make me an evil person, so I finally want to stop worrying about it, because I spent so much time thinking about others over myself. Of course, you need to think of others, but not to a degree, where you lose yourself. That is my first step to be an independent person again. This is not my duty to make everyone happy. And there is nothing snobby about that. I…
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