Nea Kris

Let the pain flow

Happy Birthday

7 Comments


Happy Birthday to me!
One more year around.
Merry day, but why no laughs?
Why it is dark in the room?

No, there is no surprise party.
Only lonely gluten free cake.
This is first time without you,
Since I came to USA.

One more year older,
And dozen times more depressed.
Each year is more terrifying.
What does future hold for me?

Happy Birthday to you!
Of course now you can
Blow all candles at once,
But your wish will not come true.

 

Funny, how many times my birthday was a very sad day. My 25th birthday was probably the best, but it was more of an exception (wild ire still wanted to ruin everything though). Last year on my birthday my boyfriend (ex *cough*) forgot to get me flowers or present, but while we were celebrating, he locked himself in the bathroom and was talking to his new love, because she demanded attention. Next day we went to the restaurant with my parents, and right before they came, I realized that he for real has another girl. However, we had registration, I didn’t want to let down my parents, so for the rest of the evening I had to pretend that everything is alright, until we came home and I asked “no point to lie now. You have somebody else, don’t you?”
I hate my birthdays. Just a reminded of the fact that I am a terrible failure, which is getting close to the end of the life, without any real success.  And what is your most hated yearly holiday/day?


7 thoughts on “Happy Birthday

  1. Birthdays, hands down.

    I hear they are meant to be lively affairs, celebrating a new year of life and all the potential of the future.

    But I am always sick for my birthday, it never fails. When I should be partying it up with my friends, I am actually stuck in bed, sneezing into tissues, or something equally disgusting.

    I haven’t had a party in years… But, being myself and perhaps unreasonably optimistic I still try every year to achieve something.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You are allowed to feel as you will, but allow me to point out something, please.

    There are no lies this year, those that love you are there for you; no half hearted affections, no obligations.

    You are surrounded by those who love you, even if all you can see is that cake; there are still many people who are behind you and won’t lie like your ex, who considered it his obligation to do so.

    Like

  3. Hey, happy birthday! Leave the past behind and have an amazing year!
    New friends, new experiences, new love?
    Who knows what the future holds?

    Have you ever heard that old song the futures so bright I gotta wear shades?

    I predict an amazing year ahead for you!

    My birthdays on Monday lol!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I hope you have a happy birthday. May I present a gift? It is a big SMILE. In my most humble opinion and experience, if you just turn a little sideways, figuratively speaking, and see there are other sides to life you can turn to that doesn’t have to be one of despair. As humans, we have a wide spectrum of feelings and expressions, I suggest you dare to get closer to the spectrum of seeing yourself in a better light because we are all part of this universe in which we all deserve to be happy. Choose to see the good in you and you will find hope because you do have certain control. One big thing is how you talk to yourself. Experiences, good and bad, are not signs of failure, but are signs of having lived and learned and hopefully growing from that. Listen to Gloria Gaynor’s song, I Will Survive for inspiration.

    Liked by 1 person

Share you thoughts!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s